Brief Banter By Ben

A father passing by his son’s bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope propped on the pillow.


It was addressed: Dad. With the worst premonition he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands.


Dear Dad.



It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing to you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with mum and you.
I’ve been finding real passion with Julie and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her, because of her piercings, tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than me.


But it’s not only passion, Dad. She’s pregnant. Julie said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.
Julie has opened my eyes to the fact marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone; we’ll be growing it ourselves and trading it with other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.


In the meantime we pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Julie can get better, she sure deserves it!


Don’t worry Dad, I’m 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I’m sure we’ll be back to visit, so you can get to know you grandchildren.

Love,

Your son Tom.

P.S Dad, none of the above is true. I’m over at Ashley’s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that’s on my desk.


P.P.S Call when it is safe for me to come home!!!!